You have spent such a lonely life
why? why? why?
Were you too kind or
too rude in this world?
Did you care too much or
too less for this world?
Were you too extrovert or
too introvert among this world?
Which of these two extremes were you on or
were you on both?
What happened? Let me know
Why have you spent such a lonely life?
dost,
Now that you have asked
After such a long time
“Kaise ho?”,
Listen!
I have been through moments when
I had wished
jealously,
silently,
guiltily,
For that confidence which
I have witnessed comes
somehow mysteriously
By eating
That club sandwich of Rina’s Kitchenette
By wearing
that shirt of Ralph Lauren
By speaking
that language of angrezi
By watching
that TV show of Netflix
By driving
that car of Corolla
By flying
To that trip of Europe
By coming
from a family which can feed you
By going
to that therapist who can heal you
In short, dost
Listen!
I had wished
for that confidence which
I think comes perhaps
somehow mysteriously with
money
so that I could tell you
that I had
despite inhabiting a loveless world
loved you but
I will not tell you all this
Not yet because
deep down inside I am
thinking it cannot be
only money
What was it then?
I don’t know so
let me send you
this reply instead
“Me theek! Tum kaise ho?”
Beta,
I have not seen you in so long
I am worried
Where are you?
I am sure it must be
a place much better than
the house of your childhood but
still
Please come back,
What are you doing?
I am sure it must be
a work much better than
the work of your age fellows but
still
Please come back
Come back for you are
love
the love which has
consumed my life
I am much older
I am much weaker
I am much nearer to death
When I am
without you
Please come back
bring all the revolutions
fight all the injustices
that your youth and education has
taught you to dream of
but not now
Wait,
Let me die
Let me die in your arms
peacefully
Then you are free to
go back to your fights
But for now
Please come back
Come back!
Seeing you growing up, I am noticing
You can be so full of expressions
sadness, anger, happiness, excitement, playfullness
You express them all
multiple times throughout the day
But seeing you growing up, I am also noticing
How one day you will no longer be
so diversely expressive
You will be dull and violent
Because you have to be a boy, man
Which means you have to be dull and violent
like your father
I am noticing the present you and fearing the future you
May I be proven wrong.
There are people
around you
homeless, friendless, pennyless
Do you ever wonder
how
they tackle sadness
or perhaps
they never get sad
sadness is a privilige
granted to those
who have home, friends, money
to cure them of it
So they dont get sad
because they dont have
home, friends, money
to cure them of it
In an ugly world full of
corruptions
pains
dishonesties
Who are the people?
The ones who still preserve
their innate, childlike, former
beauty.
They are the people
A diamond in a trash.
Where do they go?
The homeless
The loveless
The ones without friends
The ones without family
Let me know
I will join them.
Rust does not limit itself to the iron
it enters human beings too
through the sunshine of depression
the waters of hard labors
Lets derust
through the raisin of love
Lets meet
not here, not today
lets wait
for another time, another place
when the lost beauty returns
the beauty of hearts
and the beauty in labors
the beauty of minds
and the beauty in existence
Lets meet
not here, not today
but somewhere, someday
when the world is redeemed
its due beauty.
Till then, lets wait
It is sad
to live in a home
which is abandoned
in the morning
its people going out
to earn, to work
and which is full of loud noise
in the evening
the noise of television
mixed
with the noise of
loud arguments
loud fights
mostly about money
It is sad
to live in a home
where humans never actually talk
Wehshat Nama